[size=9]Amelia Enderwood: Satirist[/size]New Study Reveals Misuse of the Word ?Original? SkyrocketingSeptember 16, ?
Experts from the University of Wallamaloo, RhyDin, put out a statement today that data gathered from recently accrued research indicates the flagrant misuse of the word ?original? is on the rise.
Using incredibly invasive home monitoring means, a research team in the university?s Sociology Department collected information through verbal and written word, and have come to the conclusion that education of the definition of the word ?original? must be considered before applying its use.
According to Webster?s Dictionary, original in its adjectival form is defined as ?used or produced at the creation or earliest stage of something? (Webster, 2013). Jane Martin, a graduate student of the department, argues that the incorrect use of the word is likely attributable to some degenerative brain wasting disease.
?As I understand it, you cannot claim to be an ?original? of anything if you did not come first
. Hypothetically if I went back in time and visited my old self, that self would be the original, because that self came first. Really, is that such a hard concept to master? Some idiots don't know what they're talking about.?
The research team additionally has suggested that anyone exhibiting such elementary improper word usage should be re-educated, or otherwise publicly humiliated.