Even now, as I stand here in this darkened wood can I so easily recall the look on her face that early morn, dusk among the realm, a time to which none who stood gathered together had thought they would survive to see. I remember all too well the shrouded blood stained figures as they approached us...a battered group of survivors on top of a war afflicted grounds we all called home. A make-shift stretcher being hauled up towards us, the sight of the blood soaked cloak that had been carefully placed along the body lying there seemingly black with pooling blood that even now continued to flow so freely. There was no need for words to be shared on the fate of this fallen commander...no need to guess of whom it was they were returning home for it was my fathers broken and battered wings of onyx that hung out beside the stretcher, dragging against the ground as they approached that had told far more then even they could have hoped to reveal.
the memories come as they always do in a rush as they wash over me. I cannot help but recall how hard it was to tear my eyes from the sight of him but how I was forced to as I watched my mother collapse to the blood stained ground, the cry that came screetching from her quivering crimson stained tiers shattering the silence before dawn, the sound of it pure and unmistakable grief that no actual words could justly described it as I had witnessed it. It was then as I lost the strength in my legs just beside her that I too let go and fell to my knees beside her, the tears I wept that early eve fell uncontrollably from my eyes as all the sorrow and all the loss we had endured the past few bitter months washed over me in a wave I could not escape from. I was never meant to be spared this pain, I know that now. My eyes betrayed that single eve what it was my soul could not come to express and as I came to at last find the inner strength to rise to my feet my father's broken body set out before us the shroud pulled free from his visage, it seemed then that something came over me...changed my fate as I gazed down against his lifeless form. Funny as I remember even now that I was never fully aware of my twin brother standing at my side speaking words of compassion and faith.. sad he never acually realized that I had lost my belief in faith some time ago. The skies opened and wept, mirroring our sorrow that early morn, wept for the inevitable fall of the 'al Torr family.
It was there along that cliff's face that I lost not only my father but my mother as well. The pain she had been forced to endure was too much for her to bare any longer and at his loss she in turn lost her will to go on without him.
We buried my father with the highest honors one could recieve within the Order of Silver Rose. He was a hero they had said... to bad he had to loose his life to be recognized as such. That night was the third time in which my mother Lalandra Nemesis Algren Brae attempted to take her own life. I had consulted with my instructor who had also been my aunt on what to do as of late and at last she had finally agreed that it was time to take matter into her own hands. Lana Darkheart had stepped from the veils of deaths shadows to walk among the realm of the living at the request of her niece to see what it was she could do. She was still in debt to her counterpart Lalandra but that was a tale for another day. She found her easliy enough lying along the gravesite of Pirvan Jaegendar 'al Torr, her voice echoing almost unrealmly in the ancient tongue of her bloodline, the Irda, captivating and almost mesmorizing to any whom had the chance to hear it carried along the wings of the winds that eve. Lana visited with my mother there at my fathers grave site for quite some time before she had come to her decision at last. I can still recall the look in her Deep, aqua hued eyes as she leaned towards me, her decision made.
"I fear there is no other way my beloved. I must do what it was we had discussed earlier. All arangements has been made prior and I ask only that you have faith in me for a time longer and understand there can be no other way without there being a need for one of the Orders men to come and unearth your father so that your mother may at last rest beside him. But I must be certain before I can go any further that you willingly accept what will come to be.."
I had loved my aunt and trusted her fully regardless of the history that came between her and my mother. She had always did her what she could to guide me in the direction that was best for me and helped grant me the tools to make peace with the growing darkness that had come close to devouring all that I had once been. At this moment I did not hesitate for I knew with all of my being that what was being done was being done so for the best of my family and so I had come to terms with the decision some time ago. Lana made good on her promise and severed the hold my mother held so dear to my fallen father, releasing her soul from the eternal grief she was succumbing to. When the concencreation had passed my mother no longer remembered her part in this realm or the life she had lived for so many moon turns... Grief and loss no longer meant anything to her and she left the Orders grounds a woman free to start anew though I knew watching her disappear on horseback into the dense wood that she would never truly and utterly forget and there would come a time when answers would be demanded and in turn given. She only prayed that her mother would in the end forgive her. Lana had told her that she had arranged for Lalandra to live out the remainder of her life among the nomads of the Al'Tauraen glades just outside the borders of Rhydin. It was a debt repaid. I knew she would be safe there and be given a chance at complete renewal...a means to start anew. I could accept that. MY twin brother, Zarael, left after we had laid my fathers body to rest. He spoke of personal business with his Mage order and so I let him go from me. I never pried into his personal business, if he wished for me to know he would tell me.
I at last found myself free to set off on my own, I was ready to leave the past behind me and start anew along a path of my own choosing. There was nothiong left for me here. Among the few personal possessions I choose to take along with me I carried a silver etched medallion belonging to my mother that dated back to a time long lost, an artifact of my ancient bloodline belonging to my long lost grandfather, Igraine, ruler of the Irda people and along the silver chain taht now adorned my neck I placed four onyx feathers taken from my fathers body before we laid him to rest as a constant reminder of where it was I had come from. Irda and Seraphan...Demon and Vampire.. My history was a mesh of heart ache and loss..
Some say "Iridal, you are running...", I can only shake my head in disagreement for I am not running... I am merely surviving.
*(Open SL so please feel free and join in..)*[/code]