Tuesday, 25 April, 2017
She deserved better. Someone better than him, or maybe a better him. Either way, Kruger knew she deserved more than he was able to give. He was happy, that wasn?t the problem. He?d made a thousand strides forward, digging his feet in and climbing the hill. That was the problem, It wasn?t a simple situation of one step forward and two back. It was more like Sisysphus, though instead of a boulder it was Kruger who fell only to land at the bottom once more.
He?d loved them, all of them. He still loved her for that matter. So why did it come to this? Because he knew he couldn?t give more, and as he had already realized she deserved the things he couldn?t do. This wasn?t just some simple fling, perhaps it had started that way, though he would beg to differ. They?d been together over a year though, and sure he?d noticed the thing she wanted most in the world. He was grateful to her for wanting it with him. Kruger could do it, he?d done so before. That had become a mess, but Niko had come from the chaos.
He loved them all still, would give most anything not to be who he was right now. But he?d left them too, the dark haired, diminutive women, the powerful and chaotic, the red heads. All but the one who?d left him first, and in a way so permanent that it still hurt. Much as he wished it were different, that he was, they just weren?t her. Kruger didn?t remember pulling his phone free of his back pocket. Somewhere in the sifting of his memories it had ended up there. He input his fingerprint ID, turning on the screen and swiping his way through screens.
He wanted to say more. If only he knew what more to say. Kruger sighed, this was going to hurt, and not just him.
Text to Annabeth: We need to talk.